Saturday, November 23, 2019

Stickin' a Pin In It.

I'm going to set the stage a bit, so that when I tell you what happened this morning to me on my walk you'll understand why it made such an impression on me. There are a couple things you need to know in order to appreciate it fully.

First is this:  When I'm on my walks/runs (let's just call it "whatevering" and be done with it) I listen to music. If I'm just ambling along, I'll listen to any number of playlists that I just love hearing. For example - every year during Lent I listen, over the course of several walks, any number of recordings of Jesus Christ Superstar. When I need to think something through, I often listen to Vivaldi's Four Seasons, especially Max Richter's "recomposition" of it. And when I need to feel all "I am woman, hear me roar," I queue up Beyonce's Homecoming. 

But when I'm out whatevering in an attempt to get my heart rate up and keep it up, I listen to playlists I've thrown together over several years. There are so many songs on these lists I would never in a million years listen to in any other setting. Some would embarrass my children; some embarrass me. It's all about the pace and the energy, and very, very often, I'll just hear a snippet of something when I'm going through whatever albums iTunes throws at me and add it and move on, without listening all the way through. Seriously -- 10 seconds of the opening is all I pay attention to when I'm adding stuff. I don't listen to the words before adding a song, and often don't really pay much attention to them when I'm whatevering. I always hit shuffle when I choose a playlist, so I never know what's coming up, and because most of my lists have about 4 hours worth of songs I typically only hear about 1/8 - 1/4 of the songs thereon.

The second thing is this: I wear a bunch of bangles on my right arm that I never take off.  All but two are from a company called Mantra Bands Each of them have some saying, or snippet of verse, or bit of inspiration that I chose as motivators. They are open on the back, so the fronts of them are usually on the inside of my arm (see picture) where only I can see the words. They are most comfortable this way, and only rarely do they ever get turned around, facing "up." In fact, the only time I intentionally do so is when one turns a bit, which happens sometimes when I'm getting dressed or when I've been fidgeting with them.



Now that you know those two things, here's the rest of the story. 

I went out for my whatever this morning at the park in which I love to walk, and had whatevered about 2 miles when it began to rain. I decided not to get soaked this time so I took a break to get a small umbrella out of my car. Today wasn't about speed, so although carrying the umbrella messed with my pace a bit, I didn't really care. The rain slowed enough when I hit my 3rd mile I closed the umbrella up, and slipped the cord over my right wrist so I could keep an easy grip on it as I continued to walk. 

At mile 3.5 I sensed someone was coming up way too close to me, as in seriously violating my personal space. That's unusual even when there are lots of people in the park with me, but I was the only person there this morning  -- had been the only person there for more than half an hour, as evidenced by a parking lot empty except for my car. I figured someone may have walked into the park from the neighborhood, but they were way too close to me and it was weird. I wasn't frightened, just annoyed. I said, loudly, as I turned my head in their direction, "Good morning!" I just really wanted them to know I knew they were there, if that makes sense. 

There was no one there.  No one. That stopped me in my tracks. Literally. My heart was pounding and I just stood there in an effort to collect myself. 

As I was now standing still, I became aware that one of my bracelets was pushing into my wrist, likely because of the umbrella strap twisting it. And I also noticed that I was standing right in front of this tree I'd already taken note of because it looked like it was on FIRE due to its beautiful autumnal oranges and reds. (The colors you see here don't do it justice.) 


Well, you know me. I just had to pull my phone out and take a snapshot. I mean, my whatever pace was already shot because of the eerie interruption. As is my wont, I began do some free association -- the tree looked like it was on fire.... Moses and the Burning Bush....  yada yada -- while I was raising the phone to take the picture.....   and when I lifted my right arm I couldn't help but notice the one random bracelet that was now turned to the outside of my wrist. 



At this point, we can cue the moment I thought this might be post-worthy. But it gets better. 

I'm standing there, thinking of Moses and burning bushes and "what is that in your hand" and still wondering what that was that had compelled me to stop in the first place, and looking at that bracelet .... well. I'm not the brightest crayon in the box but I was beginning to think this was one of those moments in which I should just stand and listen. And I thought (which you can read as prayed), "Whatcha got for me, God?" 

(Now, keep in mind, that I had had that random playlist running in my ears. I'd been listening to tunes by Meghan Trainor, Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Queen, The Avett Brothers, Justin Timberlake, Beyonce, Pink, Sia, Gwen Stefani, Santana, Jaden, and Usher.)

And the minute I asked that question, a song came up in the shuffle that I had never heard before, one that I must have added at some point because the opening measures seemed like it might give me a nice gentle pace to walk to, and this was it.


I haven't always been kind. I'm not always kind now, even when I'm trying to be so very intentional about it, so what I'm guessing is that I need to work harder at this until it doesn't feel like such
hard work.

MESSAGE RECEIVED. 

I'm not writing this for any of you who might be reading it. I'm writing it for me. This just felt like one of those moments into which I needed to stick a pin.

Listen to Frank Turner's Be More Kind here.






Saturday, June 8, 2019

Where to now, God?


My Church is in tatters. By that I mean, the United Methodist Church. Those of you who are (or were) fellow Methodists understand what I'm saying. Those of you who are not may know something of our plight, but may not understand the complexity of what's happened/happening/likely to happen. 

I'm not sure I do, entirely. 

What I do know for true is this:  Since the day I became a United Methodist as a teenager, my Church has been my safe place. When anything - everything - in my life was going to hell on a trolley, I could always turn to my Church for guidance and grace. I have always been able to find my way back to the heart of my faith - and to a relationship with my God and with the people around me - through the Wesleyan Quadrilateral. 

Scripture
Tradition
Reason
Experience

These four components have been the framework I've used any time I've needed to find my plumb line or my way home. The upheaval that is taking place in my Church right this minute seems to me to have its root in the abandonment of this Quadrilateral by many who have a much different vision for our future than do I. 

And we are now clearly at a crossroads. Each United Methodist you know is having a struggle right now, no matter where they fall on the spectrum of the issues facing us. We all hold our local churches dear, and nobody wants to walk away from communities that have been part of their lives. 

I'm not going anywhere; not yet. Using the Quadrilateral as my guide, I have come to realize and embrace that throughout time, God has always moved His people from one place to another, all the while knowing full well that they were filled with uncertainty. He's walked His people out of gardens, over flooded earth, through deserts and seas, out of the bellies of beasts, up sorrowful ways, and into the blinding light of transformation. 

The crisis  we are facing right now is not one brought about by evil people. It's a matter, I believe,  of their deeply held belief that God has ever been content to leave us where we were.

He is a mover, and a shaker, and in these uncertain times I find myself exhilarated by the notion that He is not done with us yet. 





Tuesday, January 1, 2019

My 2018 Arts and Entertainment in Review

Books

I read 55 books this year. 55% of those read from my Kindle , and about half of those were digitally borrowed from either the Autauga-Prattville Public Library ($15 a year for out of county membership) or the Fairfax Public Library ($27 a year for out of state membership). I regret that my local library no longer makes digital downloads available for the Kindle, but I did borrow 5 "real" books from them in 2018.  I listened to 12 books this year, the best of which was Jason Reynolds' gut-wrenching, beautiful, provocative, hypnotic reading of his own work, Long Way Down.  This is a novel in verse that I believe should listened to, because the sense of immediacy, the emotional wallop, is made even more profound in the hearing of the story.

I ditched 7 books last year, and gave too many of those significantly more rope than they deserved. So, I'll be going back to my 75 page rule for 2019. (I'm not kidding when I tell you I got fully 2/3 of the way through one of those books before breaking up with it.)

76% of my reading was fiction, and as top heavy as that number is, it it much, much improved from years past.

The following books got 5 star reviews from me in 2018. The only criteria I really have to give a book 5 stars is that when I finished reading (or listening to) it, I wanted to go grab somebody and make them read it, too. These are listed in the order in which I read them. (Hyperlinks go to my Goodreads reviews.)


Destiny of the Republic (Candace Millard, read by Paul Michael)

Hannah Coulter (Wendell Berry)

Long Way Down (Written and read by Jason Reynolds)

I'll Be Gone in the Dark (Michelle McNamara, read by Gabra Zackman) 


Bone Music (Christoper Rice)

The Buddha in the Attic (Julie Otsuka) 

The Punishment She Deserves (Elizabeth George, read by Simon Vance) 

The Chalk Man (C.J. Tudor)

A Duty to the Dead (Charles Todd)



Movies

I saw 19 movies on the big screen in 2018. Favorites (linked here to their trailers) were: 








Live Theatre

We saw 11 plays this year; 10 at the Alabama Shakespeare Festival, and one at Birmingham Jefferson Civic Center. The highlights were these: 

Fly  (ASF)

Lion King (BJCC)

Annie (ASF)


Gospel of Luke (ASF) - Note: I could not find a video clip that did it justice in any way, but if you ever have the opportunity to see Bruce Kuhn perform this where you are, go. 

Music

I attended 5 live musical performances this year, which included organ concerts and performances by the Montgomery Chorale.  I enjoyed them all, but if I could have one experience over again, it would be the Total Praise concert performed by the Chorale at Hutchinson Missionary Baptist Church. Not only was the music outstanding, it was true community experience, and one that I hope will be built upon in years to come. My hometown seems split down the middle in so many ways, and music - as it did in this instance - has the power to begin to knock those barriers down.  

Television

The biggest news here is that we finally let go of cable TV and now subscribe to Hulu Live, which includes every one of the networks (both live and archived) and most of the cable channels we particularly liked. The notable exception is BBC America, but the shows that my husband likes there that can only be watched there is also available for purchase via iTunes. That aside, we haven't missed a thing, including college football even when it's on some of the outlier channels. 

But our favorite "new" thing is the monthly subscription we have to Acorn TV, which is a streaming service featuring mostly British series, both new and old. We have finished all seasons of the quirky Australian series 800 Words, and are currently enjoying working our way through Foyle's War, the remarkably stunning and unusual Suspects, and No Offense, which made us laugh about all manner of terribly inappropriate things through all the currently available seasons. I have marked my calendar for later in January, when a new season begins. 

We treated ourselves to a total binge of Doc Martin via Netflix and were bereft when we got completely caught up, because the new season won't be around for nearly another year. 

Notable documentaries, also watched via Netflix were The Staircase, and the utterly heartbreaking God Knows Where I Am


*****

What were YOUR favorites?